This page is about a Mom who likes to think she is closer to the Hot side than the alternative. Here is my story of the daily journey of a less than rich, less than skinny and more than happy lady :D

Wednesday, August 31, 2016

I Miss My Time With You...

I Miss My Time With You....

"i miss my time with you

those moments together
i need to be with you each day
and it hurt's me when you say
you're too busy
busy trying to serve me
but how can you serve me
when your spirit's empty
there's a longing in my heart
wanting more than just a part of you
it's true
i miss my time with you"



This song has been running through my head the last few weeks. Anyone raised around church or around gospel music could probably sing it word for word. If you haven't had the privilege, follow the link above. Larnelle Harris was a smart man. And the guy can sing. Not to mention his swanky style back in the 80's and 90's. But I digress...

This part of the song is from God's perspective. How we get so busy doing things for Him that we fail to actually have a relationship with Him. Wow. Just let that sink in... We are so consumed with doing the things for the kingdom that we don't even have time for the King. Ouch.

Someone has to clean the church, to coordinate the events, teach the kiddos and greet the visitors. But should that come at a price? Does that take precedent over our relationship? I can promise you that if you are not seeking time with Him, you won't be able to sustain the heart to serve. When you try to serve out of selfish gain or obligation it shows, and you burn out so very quickly. I'm speaking from personal experience y'all... "You're too busy..."

On to the second application, the one that has hit home just as hard. I feel like these words are coming from my boys. My five year old has asked me three time since school started if we could spend some time together, just "me and you Mom". Cue the waterworks. Ouch again.

Am I so busy serving them- lunches, laundry, fun activities, cleaning, just life- that the 5 year old has to ask me to make time for him? What could be more important than to make them feel like they matter, that my time for them is more important than anything else, that they are important to me? What example am I setting for my kids? Where's the balance? "Busy trying to serve me..."

Being responsible and doing my job as a mom is important. Those lunches do have to be packed, the homework needs to be done and someone has to do the laundry. Showing my boys that there are things that have to be done and including them in the doing it also important to me. Teaching them that Momma doesn't do everything, and that the hamper isn't a magic box that turns out clean clothes and that the dishes don't wash themselves, in my opinion, is a way I can raise them into good men and one day good husbands. Letting them contribute and take ownership of tasks gives them responsibility and they have a glowing pride when their job is a job well done. I feel like I've found my stride there.

But I am failing and the relational part of this. One way I know I need to do more for my big guy is that I have no patience with him and the way he's being a kid. He's weathering the storm of Kindergarten and I'm not giving him grace in this change. We used to spend most every day together and in most of those moments when I'd nearly lose my cool (hey, don't judge me; if you are a mom and you haven't screamed in a pillow, we need to have a talk), I was able to take a breath and extend the grace he needs. Lately, not so much. He's gone every day, almost all day. When we are together its all business on my end- homework, pick up toys, eat dinner, bed and repeat. There's no value in that time for him. If I made more time for him, time where he and I could just be, I know that I could give him the grace he needs. He needs more than just a part of me...

I need to commit the time. Time for my walk with Christ, for my marriage and for my children- uninterrupted time, undistracted time, undiluted time. I am so consumed sometimes by what isn't done that I can't always see what can be done. I recently had an eye opening moment while I was drying up the puddle of tears my 5 year old provoked: we are blessed with 168 hours in each week- its time to make the waking ones matter...



Friday, August 5, 2016

Make Over Your Momma: Zig Zagging

Okay moms. Its been a while since I've come to talk to you... but this is something I can't keep to myself any longer. 




I don't know where I heard this term or who came up with it, but I can tell you that its detrimental. It can take over the most organized person and make their day a living nightmare. It plagues us all and I am tired of being quiet about it. I am here to speak out and try to curve the disaster known as "Zig Zagging". Or if you feel more proper- you can call it Chevron-ing?!





Yes, this looks like my 3 year old's self portrait from earlier today, but this could be the key to making your day better, more productive. Let me set the scene...

Exhibit A: You walk into the kitchen and you see the mail. Half of it is to be shredded, one quarter of the pile are coupons that you'll probably never use, and the other bunch might be important but it might also be offers for AARP memberships and pre-paid Visa cards. You take the shredded mail into the place where you keep the AMEX black card offers (wink, wink) and your old insurance cards. You notice that there is a pile of shoes right next to the shredder stack. You divide the shoes up to return them to their home. After carrying two pairs into your husband's closet you notice that half of your socks are in a pile that you deem to be the "missing their mate" pile. You start to sort those socks out and see that three have holes. You deliver those socks to the box of old shirt/socks/towels that you use for who-knows-what. That prompts you to start a load of laundry, again. Because you forgot you started it last night before bed and it was 80 degrees cool at midnight. By now you are probably hungry or thirsty or both. Back to the kitchen you go, where you see the other two-thirds of the mail that you started sorting in the first place.

Exhibit B: There's a deadline. And you have pushed said responsibility back until the last minute (or the "golden hour" as I like to think of it). After making a list of what all needs to be done to accomplish this task and compute the time and effort its going to take, you take a huge huff. 3 hours of work and 1 hour and 45 minutes to do it. Hey, you pulled it off in college and you are way more experienced now- you got this girl! But wait, its not only you that you have to worry about. Your children/spouse suddenly have a dying need to see you, and sit by you, and tell you their hopes and drreams. You are down to 1 hour 33 minutes and 7 units of patience. But you start to feel guilty... if only I had started sooner; I hate to cut my time short with them; did I ever feed them dinner? So you dedicate the next 25 minutes to loving and caring and eating (#priorities). Now you are down to about 60 minutes give or take a few GIFs you come across that you just HAVE TO share and a bathroom break so you can read a blog.

Either case, you need to focus. Usually you'd reach for caffeine right? Maybe a few jumping jacks or something to get your brain awake. What if I told you there was a blend of essential oils that could provide you with all things focus? 
  • Enhances and sustains a sense of focus.
  • Supports efforts of those who have difficulty paying attention & staying on task.
  • Apply to wrists or back of hands & inhale deeply to promote a sense of clarity.
  • Use at work to stay on task or when feeling tired mid-afternoon.
  • Diffuse or drop on a clay pendant & place on a desk or in other key areas in a classroom.
  • Study-time blend.

    If you are anything like me, you'd say:
    "Yeah right. Sounds too good to be true"... 
    "This crazy lady with her snake oils." 
    "If its that good, why haven't I heard of it before now?"

    That's where I was a few years ago. Just living my life, oblivious to how many areas of my life that I was just getting by. I was unfocused, impatient, and zig-zagging my way through life. I happened upon this oil by chance. Since I finally decided to try it and felt so much clarity and so much more confidence, I use it EVERY SINGLE DAY.
    Ask yourself, what's it going to hurt to try? Can it do anything but make your life better... and really, can it get any better than sorting through your AARP membership cards at 35?

    Message me if you want to get on board and get tuned in to a better you...

    Monday, February 8, 2016

    Monday Mommy Hack: Second Day Hair (DIY Dry Shampoo)

    Happy Monday friends!!!

    I find as a mom I have less time and less energy to spend- or even care sometimes- about how I look. Messy bun and tights are my go to when life gets in the way of my plans.

    One thing I am not great at is doing my hair. I don't ever allow enough time or I struggle with getting the style to turn out the way that girl on Pinterest did- in just 3 easy steps... This drives me to aim for great "Second Day Hair". That's 3-4 less washes a week, using less of my favorite hair products and spending less time jazzing up these locks.

    Enter my hero- dry shampoo! I first learned about dry shampoo when my sister was in the hospital for a extended period of time. Baths are not always possible or the first priority at these "extended day spas", so using dry shampoo was necessary for both patient and care taker. We were sot thankful for it then, and I'm still thankful now!

    No more washing your hair every day or feeling like you have to ruin a great style because your roots are getting oily. Don't get gross on my now ladies. You will have to wash your hair again, But maybe not as often...

    There are many brands and options out there, but another thing you should know about me is that I try to avoid chemicals at all costs. I used an OTC spray for years, but every time I sprayed it on my eyes would water and my sinuses would go nuts. Here is where my searching started.



    I have found a few more natural recipes of dry shampoo that I have tried over the years. Some made me look like a grannie with grey roots (which I hear is all the rage these days), other's didn't do anything but add to my oily root issue.

    I'm about to try this recipe out using natural products and essentials oils.


    Here's the blog I found it on:
    DIY Dry Shampoo



    For light hair:
    ¼ cup arrowroot powder
    2 drops Lavender essential oil
    2 drops Rosemary essential oil
    2 drops Peppermint essential oil

    For dark hair:
    2 tablespoons arrowroot powder
    2 tablespoons cocoa powder
    2 drops Lavender essential oil
    2 drops Rosemary essential oil
    2 drops Peppermint essential oil


    Directions: 
    1. Put arrowroot powder, cocoa powder (is using), and essential oils into food processor. 
    2. Pulse until well combined.
    3. Store in glass jar.
    4. To use, apply powder with an old make-up brush to roots and or oily parts of hair.

    I'd love to hear your ideas for great "Second Day Hair"!


    Monday, February 1, 2016

    Monday Mommy Hack: Jamberry Nail Wraps

    Simple, quick, affordable and functional. Those are 4 words that speak to my Love Language.
    When I was introduced to Jamberry Nail Wraps over a year ago, I was a sceptic. It seemed like a lot of work and I'm not one to take on work when I don't have to. I've never been one to do my nails. Shoot, I don't even like to put makeup on (but I do for everyone else's sake).

    I did these on New Year's Eve. If you notice I have short nails, but I think I looked polished and put together when I have my nails done.

    Aside from all these benefits, I find these points to be even more amazing!

    From their website: Jamberry Home Page

    Jamberry nail wraps are a one-of-a-kind way to express your unique style!

    Plus, through innovative technology our nail wraps are:

    Non-toxic

    5 free (Dibutyl Phthalate, Toluene, Formaldehyde, Formaldehyde Resin or Camphor)

    Easy to apply at home

    Requires zero dry time

    Durable for long-lasting wear without chipping, peeling or fading

    Not only are they super cute, they are super safe and super easy. They have so many awesome styles and they are very affordable. I don't make time to go to the salon and get my nails done, and honestly sometimes I don't want to spend that money. These wraps can be done in less than 20 minutes, while my kids are sleeping/napping/watching a movie, and they last 10-14 days. I use lemon essential oil to remove the wraps, so I'm avoiding chemicals in my home and on my skin. I could say so much more about these wraps!!!




    If you would like a free sample please message me- I don't sell the wraps but I know some amazing ladies that would be happy to help you!!!
    And if you have tried them before, I'd love to see your Jams!!!

    Sunday, January 31, 2016

    Make Over Your Mu-Mu: If The Pants Don't Fit

    Friends, I'd like to introduce you to something that has made my life simple, made me feel better about myself and reduced the amount of stress in my day!

    I know, it sounds like a magic potion or something. Now that you mention it, it does come in a "capsule"... but its not what you're thinking!

    CAPSULE WARDROBE!!! If you don't know, you better ask somebody!!!! Here's the low down:

    A traditional capsule wardrobe is simply this:

    1. a collection of a few essential items of clothing that will not go out of fashion 
      (i.e. skirts, trousers, coats)

    2. basic pieces that can be livened up by seasonal pieces

    3. these pieces should be inter-changeable, working together in multiple ways

    I was scrolling through Facebook one day last spring and I came across a blog explaining the concept of the capsule wardrobe. I thought there was no way I could pull it off, there was no way I could operate on so few items in my closet. Here are the two ladies that I read about:

    Why I Got Rid Of My Wardrobe...

    Un-fancy: 37 piece wardrobe

    I thought these broads were bananas... B A N A N A S.

    Then I did a little homework. I was only wearing 20% of the clothing in my closet. That was so much wasted space. And so many moments of disappointment. Putting that cute shirt on only to realize my mommy pooch was prominent enough to mistake for a 4 month pregnancy. Trying those jeans on for the 137th time and guess what, they still don't fit. Ah, these yoga pants will always fit, let's wear those again.

    If you have walked down that path of thinking, this is going to make you a better, happier, more confident person. Here's where you'll want to start...



    Pinterest is a great source for options for a capsule wardrobe. Since we live in Florida it is hard to swap the seasons because summer tends to be 10 months long. I opted to keep most of my warm weather stuff available in case we have an extra sunny December day. That's what those in the biz call an "all seasons" or "life season" capsule wardrobe.

    This was my favorite website and worksheet, and I loved her approach!

    Elisa Pulliam Capsule Wardrobe Worksheet




    Here are a few other great websites I found to be very helpful:

    Un-Fancy Capsule Wardrobe Planner


    Before you even start purging, there are steps to consider:
    • Start a vision board- or use the one you already have on Pinterest:
      • Notice trends: colors, style, repetition of items
    • Create a color palette:
      • Look at the colors you have pinned and the colors you love OR
      • There are color analysis websites that will help if you'd like to be scientific
    • Choose specific items:
      • Think uniform
      • Not just with the items but the repeated style
    • Analyze your lifestyle
      • I tend to find that wedge heels are not a mommy staple...
      • But its nice to have a pair in case I want to get fancy :D
    • Assess what you already have
    • Make a shopping list using one of the linked worksheets suggested
    • GO SLOW!

    After 3 days of making lists and checking them twice, I started my purge. I spent 2 weeks making piles, debating and driving the Dashboard Dad nuts! But one huge mess turned into something beautiful!!! I slimmed it down to 75 items and its still a work in progress.




    Here are a few of my basic pieces that I wear most often and that are the easiest to accessorize. On a rushed or blah day, these are my go-to, my comfort pieces. They look put together but they are still very functional for my life.





    One thing I found important was making my closet a place of joy. I made an awesome display for my hanging jewelry, up-cycled a painting and made it a place that I like to go now. So getting ready for the day is less stressful and takes up less of my time. I'm all about streamlining my processes- hence taking 2016 to make over this momma! 

      


    I would LOVE to see some of your wardrobe redos!!!




    Monday, January 25, 2016

    Monday Mommy Hack: Play-doh Nesting Eggs!!!

    Okay Moms, if you have not heard about the Play-doh nesting egg sensation taking over the world I'm about to introduce you to a life changing phenomena. 

    Is it the surprise at the end? Is it the build up? Is it the Play-doh? 

    It can't be the voices, or the script. I think my kids would watch it on mute.

    There's just something about these eggs. 

    In the words of an up and coming lyrical genius:

    "Don't believe me just watch
    Don't believe me just watch
    Don't believe me just watch
    Don't believe me just watch
    Don't believe me just watch
    Hey Hey Hey Uh"



    Now that you've spent 16 minutes enchanted by plastic eggs and play-doh, do you get it?
    Don't worry, you're not alone... 

    Please do not think I am condoning the TV as a babysitter, but we all know that sometimes you need a few minutes to:
    - get dressed OR
    - brush your teeth OR
    - shower OR
    - eat OR
    - go to the bathroom OR
    - fill any of those basic mommy needs

    Why not give your kids the surprise of their life while you finally accomplish fulfilling your basic human needs?

    I'd love to see a few photos of you introducing this trend to your kids, or even better your spouse. See if they think you're crazy... hey they might even think you're nuts enough to tell you to take an extra long mommy break! :D


    Tuesday, January 19, 2016

    Make Over Your "Momma"

    Friends, its time.

    We have been surviving long enough.

    Its time to thrive, succeed and feel better about today than we did yesterday.

    Instead of to-do lists, we are going to work on making our to-done list.

    This year is going to be your year- to shine, to glow to be alive. To stop hiding behind the yoga pants/camera/excuses/peer pressure.

    I am going to spell out to you how to make the most of the time you have and how to feel great about getting it done.

    The coming blogs are going to be a step by step instruction on how to improve an area of your life. These are areas that we all struggle with- some more than others. I have lived these transformations and I can say I came out on the other side a better mom, wife, friend and person.

    No, I'm not a motivational speaker, but I think I could give one heck of a pep talk. But I am in a better place than I was a year ago. And I want you to be here, in the great place, with me.

    I've made over my "momma" and its your turn. Glean from my mistakes and learn from my bumbles. There are so many too...

    Get ready for (in no particular order):
    Make Over Your Mu-Mu: If The Pants Don't Fit
    Make Over Your Musk: Ain't That The Pits
    Make Over Your Mornings: Early to Bed, Early to Rise
    Make Over Your Mind: Namascraycray
    Make Over Your Mood: No More Manic Monday's
    Make Over Your Man: Trust Me, It's NOT What You Think
    Make Over Your Monthly: Just Roll With It
    Make Over Your Mid-Section: Have You Tried 6 Minute Abs?
    Make Over Your Mothership: Hacks For The Decorating Impaired
    Make Over Your Mess: 12 Step Program for the Hot Mess In Us All
    Make Over Your Madness: Chill Pill- Take 3
    Make Over Your Mindset: Pure. Simple.